How to Sharpen a Spokeshave
Customize Your Router for Centered Mortises
Speed Up Handplane Honing with Your Ruler
Simple Cabinetry with Pocket Hole Joinery
The Essential Tool Chest
Simple Tape Trick for Tight Fitting Through-Mortises
How to Sharpen Hollow Chisel Mortising Bits
A Woodworker's Guide to Grain Direction
The Coolest Cutting Board Ever?
Workbench Tool Storage Solutions
Smoothing Plane Tips and Techniques
Hinge Mortises on the Tablesaw
Drawbore Your Mortise-and-Tenon Joinery
Finishing Technique for Greene and Greene Furniture
Capture More Dust from Your Router Table
Winners Announced: You Want What Contestcomments (6) February 28th, 2011 in blogs
Update: Winners announced
pkennedy won the editors’ choice for a story about a lovely mahogany coffin for a frozen dead cat. Allencarl won for a request from a pastor for an electric chair replica.
Thanks to everyone who entered our contest.
Original post from 2/16/2011
Well-over 50 unique stories of bizarre building requests were posted as part of our recent You Want What? contest. Sifting through all the entries was no small feat but we've narrowed down the field to five wacky finalists. Now it's up to you.
Two winners will each receive a prize package worth more than $1,600, so be sure to read these stories thoroughly, and contain your laughter until after you've cast your vote in our poll.
You Want What? Contest Finalists
A Human-Style Coffin...for a Cat
Our first story came from user pkennedy, who posted a story concerning an odd request to build a coffin for a beloved pet. Now, while building a pet coffin isn't unheard of in and of itself, the specs for the box certainly were. It was to be built of mahogany, complete with side rails and a fully lined interior. Oh, and did we mention the initial phone conversation with the client? It went something like this:
Do we make what?
Ma'am, were you trying to reach someone else?
Oh, I understand, the plastic ones aren't proper for your pet.
Well, I guess we could do that for you. Let's see.
How big is your cat?
You're not sure - OK.
Where is your cat now?
In your freezer next to the frozen vegetables.
OK, can you take some measurements?
With those measurements, we build a proper coffin for your cat.
You are very welcome.
Roasting Spit for a Jet
Story number two comes from user MartinGoebel and concerns an epicurian family unwilling to put a hold on the fine dining while flying at 30,000-feet.
During certain Muslim holidays (Eid comes to mind), it is customary to celebrate over a meal of roast goat or sheep. A certain Saudi Arabian family for whom finalist number two was customizing a private jet interior, wanted to be sure they'd be able to celebrate properly while flying six miles above the Earth. Their solution? A "goat roasting cabinet" built specially for their private jet. Just another in-flight entertainment alternative. Pretty neat!
The $200 Toilet Seat
User LocoJoe wrote in with a story concerning a lucrative commercial contract that had him building aircraft toilet seats over the course of a few years! Specifications included paint selection, the type of screws to be used, mounting hardware--and everything had to be built within a tolerance of +/- 0.020. Ouch! But for $235 a seat, and an order for 200 of them, it was well worth the effort.
An Electrifying Experience
In order for them to be effective, pastors require the ability to deliver sermons that capture and keep the attention of their audience. User Allencarl wrote in about one particular pastor who commissioned him to build a realistic model of an electric chair--yes, an electric chair--for use in his sermons. Complete with all the bells and whistles, the chair is now used at wedding receptions as a gag on the unsuspecting groom.
No Way to Get a Good Night's Sleep
User Vin68 wrote in to tell us the story of a carpentry customer who timidly approached him in hopes of hiring him to work on a "different" type of woodworking project.
The client asked for a custom head board and foot board to built for her bed. They were to match each other in appearance but there was a twist. The foot board was to be hinged at the top, in order to allow some oak sliders to extend up with holes drilled in them that would accomodate wrist restraints. That's all we'll say. We wouldn't touch the rest of that story with a ten-foot pole! Yikes!
Voting ended February 24, 2011 at 5pm (EST) sharp!
posted in: blogs, contest, custommade.com, you what what?, weird furniture, bizarre furniture, wacky furniture, strange furniture
Save up to 51% on Fine Woodworking
Become a Better Woodworker
You Want What? Contest
Share your oddest client requests or stories and enter to win one of two CustomMade.com memberships and more.
Two prize packages containing the following items will be awarded:
- A one year Gold membership to CustomMade.com -- Value $1,200
- Fine Woodworking Archive DVD--Value $149.95
- Complete Illustrated Guide to Woodworking DVD-ROM--Value $199.95
- A $100 gift card to Rockler
Total prize value: $1,649.90
Whether you're a professional woodworker with a long list of clients, or a home hobbyist who receives the occasional request for a piece of furniture, you've probably been inclined to ask the question, "You want what?" at least once.
We're after you funniest, most bizarre stories. If you've ever been asked to construct a piece that just made you cringe inside, you might be a candidate for one of two free memberships to CustomMade.com.
An online marketplace connecting shoppers looking for fine custom home furnishings with the skilled artisans who create them, CustomMade.com aims to be a source for all things, well, custom made.
See What Members are Selling